"Row!" the shipmaster barked and the sting of the whip followed his command. Nick grunted and pulled on the oar, his sweat caused the lash to burn.
The young man threw a sidelong glance a Bradley. "You can take your authentic sailing experience and shove it!"
Perils of healthy living
"Oh sure, its my fault that you are so lazy that the one occasion you did something wholesome and healthy, it resulted in a tear in reality itself." Bradley shot back.
"You are just lucky that they have been feeding us since they picked us up off of that deserted island. It was a close thing for you a couple of times."
"What are you talking about, there was fresh fruit everywhere on that island."
"Given what happened the last time I did something healthy I was not about to do a repeat. I was close to polymorphing you into a sheep and eating you a couple of times."
Bradley stared at him, "You would rather kill and eat your best and only surviving friend instead of eating an orange?"
"A man does not survive on fruit alone."
"That is not how that quote goes, or what it means, you sick bastard. I knew I should have ran when I got that letter from that orginization called "Bradleys against Nick getting Bradleys killed. Why are all your dead friends named Bradley anyway?"
Suddenly a heavy hand fell on Bradley shoulder, "So you think you can talk instead of Row eh? Guess I'll have to make an example of you."
As the slave driver unshackled him and dragged him to the prow of the boat to be beaten to death Bradley sobbed, "Please no, take him instead, you are dooming us all."
As the lash began to fall a vortex spang open and sucked Nick back to his home.
Nick drew a line through an item on his list and sighed.. "Hmm, looks like I am going to have to move to New York, I am out of Bradleys in Boston."
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